When we lose someone we love it’s natural to look for signs that they are still with us or trying, in some way, to communicate with us. Many people turn to psychics when they are grieving in the hope that they can ‘speak’ with their loved one; it’s just a way of keeping them around a little bit longer and putting off the day when we have to accept that they’ve gone. I did see a psychic at one point;it helped and was certainly easier than trying to understand the bluetit that I was absolutely convinced was trying to deliver a message from my late husband. Yes, you heard right, I tried to speak bird! In my defense it was a persistent little bugger………

My husband bought a new car a few months before he died, it was a sleek, black Jaguar and he really loved it. It sat on the driveway of our house after he’d gone because I couldn’t bear to drive it. Anyway, one afternoon in late spring a bluetit took an interest and, basically, wouldn’t leave the car alone. It kept flying up to the windows as if it was looking for something and would then just sit on the wing mirror. At first I ignored it but this went on for a couple of days and I was absolutely, totally convinced that there was something in the car that I was meant to find – some sort of message from my husband. I turned that car upside down but could find nothing. Still the little bird kept coming back, always looking through the window – what was I missing??? It was driving me crazy!!

Eventually I sat in the driver’s side of the car and turned on the CD player and heard the following words:

“The gods may throw a dice
Their minds as cold as ice
And someone way down here
Loses someone dear”

The song was The Winner Takes it All by Abba and was one of my husband’s favorites. As I sat there the song continued:

“Somewhere deep inside, you must know I miss you”

I sat in that car for maybe half an hour just crying my heart out. I wanted to be comforted by the message that had been sent but the more I listened to it the more I was struck by the negative sentiments in the song:

“The winner takes it all
The loser standing small
Beside the victory
That’s her destiny”

Was my husband resentful because I was still alive? Was that what he was telling me?

By the time that I got out of the car I was an emotional wreck.

Later that day I went to see a friend who owned one of the local farms. She was a proper country girl through and through.I told her about my ‘communication’ with the blue tit and she started laughing.As you can imagine I was taken aback and somewhat hurt but then she explained that it was mating season and the bird who’d spent all that time looking in the car window and the wing mirror was basically just flirting with his own reflection. I felt a bit daft at this point.

So was the bird bringing a message from the other side or was it just feeling fruity and doing what birds do? I don’t know but at the time it gave me what I needed and that was hope……..

Join the conversation! 2 Comments

  1. There is truly some connection between birds and death. Birds have appeared out of nowhere in my presence each time after someone dies.


  2. Thanks so much for your comment Wendy; it’s good to know that someone else out there has had a similar experience. I think we have a great affinity with mother nature than we might suppose – did you also feel as though they were trying to tell you something?



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About feelingyounger

I'm learning about myself and about life every day. I write a blog on www.widowonline.com (You are not alone) for something to do and I write poetry because I enjoy it.




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